PLUG it in.

one day after the day before..

Friday, July 24, 2009

one day after the day before today. moving on....

nothing much, i didnt cared about it anymore. as long as i know that my mum has nothing to be paid. my dad has to do something about himself.. and the debts. i will help out too. saving and using the money i earn. if not enough, then maybe i need an extra job. i have to push myself to handle it(: i know i can.

i know of a God that helps me always. he has been my provider for a long time. this time, he really want to test my ability of looking for him and having faith in Him.

the post below if you are reading it, better read fast! it will disappear by 25july 2009, 2359.

by the way if you want to know more? email me at dx1r3j@hotmail.com(: mention your name!

the post below shows how one person will react in different times. it isnt what God will do(:

take care!! good bye!

Thursday, July 23, 2009

GOD SAY WE HAVE TO SUFFER? BUT I DON THINK LIKE THIS! I AM SORRY GOD! I AM SORRY..... I AM SORRY. A LITTLE PRAYER MAKES ALL THING WELL

I AM SORRY, CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE! STUDY HARD! GET GOOD GRADES! ENJOY LIFE! PROSPER! GET DREAMS! GET CAR! GET WHAT I WANT! GET ON WITH LIFE.... WANT TO QUARREL, WANT TO FIGHT, GOOOOOOO GOOO FIGHT!! FOR ALL I CARE. WANT TO BREAK FAMILY! GO! BUT WATCH OUT!! YOU BREAK EVERYTHING AND SAY NOT YOU YOUR FAULT! YOU ARE FORCED! YOU PLAY STUPID GAMES! YOU DO THIS BECAUSE YOU WANT TO GET BACK AT HER! AND MAKE US SUFFER!!!! FUCK YOU!!FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!

struggles.

i am not sure who will read this. but what the heck?? FAMILY its a place to be safe in, a place where you know there are people you can trust. when relations strains and all things comes down to this thing. called money.. what will happen? i really feel like hurling vulgarities. i really feel like! MONEY MONEY MONEY. TO BE ABLE TE PAY PFF THE DEBTS, TO BE ABLE TO FEED THE FAMILY. TO BE ABLE TO GO FOR TUITION, BUY NECESSITIES, GET THINGS FOR THE HOUSE, SO MANY THINGS. ALL THE THOUGHT GOING THRU MY HEAD. ALL THE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS. I THINK I REALLY FEELING LIKE MOVING AWAY. AWAY FROM HOME. I KNOW I WIL MISS PEOPLE. I KNOW THAT I GOT NOTHING WITH ME. I KNOW ITS JUST RUNNING AWAY. OKAY, I AM SORRY. BUT FUCK IT! I DON CARE ANY MORE! VULGARITIES! FUCK ALL THE THINGS THAT AFFECT MY FAMILY! FUCK ALL THOSE THINGS THAT HURTS MY FAMILY!!!!! FUCK ALL OF YOU!!! I CAN T CANT TKAE ALL THESSE SHIT!! FUCK EVERYTHING !!!!!!!!!!!!!