only the one that makes the mark

the best Love i can ever give.

2011-11-02T14:09:00.000-07:00

if you know that this is for you. i could never hate you, only because i cant stop loving you. if one day, you needed help. call upon me, i still care about you.

Catherine Dorinda.

what i have written so far...

2011-04-14T04:15:00.000-07:00

FRIENDS. one of the most important things in my life.. they define who i am. they are who i want to be with. never will i want to hurt any of them. never wanting to lose them. but with only who i am, how to keep all of them close? making effort to keep my treasures close to me.

afraid that people will judge me for the things i do. afraid that because of my decisions, they will not like me. please don judge me, cos i aint perfect, cos i aint who you want me to be. i can be blur at times, i cant be an asshole sometimes.. but am i not like that always. i just want to be with my friends. when they are happy, i am happy. they smile, i smile.

they say " those who matter, dont care. those who care, dont matter" that sint true. thats bullshit to someone who treasure all his friends. one that doesnt open up to everyone, only those few that you know who you are. but when i open, its like a freaking dam that pours out. i really treasure those that talks to me. be it guy or girl. be it younger or older than me. doesnt really matter. someone once told me, " i know you better than you know yourself" you are right.. maybe only you know me that well.

recently, i found a new friend. someone i can talk about everything with. someone i knew for 3 years already. but we are just hi-bye friends.. somehow, we just cliqued... somehow, like magic. i can just say what i want. and i know you wont judge, cos you don like people to judge too. perfect friend, i would say. this could be a start of a long friendship. i want to treasure this and all the others i have had. this time, its gonna be different, i am gonna work hard to keep my friends. all of them.

nice.

2011-03-27T10:15:00.000-07:00

i hate myself for being to gullible. being so nice and in the end hurting myself. why am i so nice? why sometimes i cant be someone that walks around feeling pissed off and angry. why cant i have a face like leroy, always fierce. those who don know him, doesnt dare talk to him. those who know him, only talks when there is a need. those who are close to him, only truly know him. why am i so gullible? so be cheated again and again. strangers who are selfish, cunning. big fake ass bastard, i would say. these people, really pisses me off. to the point, i would love knock their head off their shoulder, literally. 80/20 rule. 20% of the people in this world is nice. 20% of the nice people hopefully stays in singapore. 20% of the people who are nice and stays in singapore hopefully are my friends.

and that would be more than enough. i hate it how people will want to take advantage of those that are nice. and those that are nice, having to suck it up and move on. its not that they cannot do anything, its they just choose to let it go. no matter how big or small that issue is.. nothing is too big for them to let it go. it maybe an expensive lesson that they learn, to a mistrust between a close friend and still chooses to forgive, to a slap in the face or hit on the head and still chooses not to lash out at the person.

so what are the things nice people can do so they them will not be hurt or suffer? ohh, hurt and suffering are always there? then how to suffer or hurt lesser? tell me.

so much to say..

2011-03-24T12:04:00.000-07:00

so much to say, so much to type... i am afraid of how ppl will see me. afraid that people will ask me about it. afraid to share with others cos i know, the moment someone presses hard enough, everything will go. afraid how people will think of me.

yet, the only reason i will write it here is because i know, very few people knows that i have a blog. even lesser, knows that this space is still alive. even fewer will come by this space.

i'm done.

opening it up just to close it again

2011-02-14T12:58:00.000-08:00

its been about 4 years. 4 years seems a long time enough. 4 years of being afraid. there were a few times in the past 2 years. yet, those times i didnt work hard enough because i felt afraid. i let it past. i let it fade. yet, when i finally know this is it. this is the one. i open so wide, ready to let myself lost out. i was just so sure. yet again, i was wrong.

like a year ago, when i saw you. i knew you were great, almost perfect. it didnt matter, who you were, how you changed. cos i know inside you are all the same. that same person i first knew, that same person i had feelings for. you are worth it, so worth it. worth the time, the wait.

stupid. if i hadnt chose to let myself fallen head over heels. i think i would have still be able to walk.

is it true?

2010-10-09T12:53:00.000-07:00

many know me without problems, without fear.

always smiling not many ever see me cry.(if you did, well, you have had the privilege)

shock comes to those closer friends and family, when i shared about the problems that had just stepped out of. i never tell anyone. no one. its just me. problems were just for myself to overcome or for me to breakthrough. many close friends said" Dejun, you need to share about it. cannot just keep it to yourself."

i never ever listens. i continued to keep problems to my own. reason was simple: i want those around me to be happy. always.

problems brings sadness. hurt. fear.

i never want my friends or family to feel that way around me.

that's what i told myself. that's what i believed in.

today, i was casually talking to my friend. he was telling me what he and two others were talking about me. somehow he told me in exact words, quoting from another friend of mine, "maybe he is facing problems and there is no one he can turn to"

i sat there, no words came out.

i felt tears swelling up my eyes.

i didnt know why.

yet again, i stop myself from letting it drop down.

it was as if, those words shot right through me leaving huge gap in my body.

is it true? what he had said.

is it?

deep down i felt i know .. ..

this how i want to live my life...

2010-06-14T11:16:00.000-07:00

Every day, 24 hours passes by. Every hour, 60 mins passes. Every moment, 1 seconds passes. Question, how are you living that very moment?

The biggest regret in my life is not doing the most I could have, today.

Yet the biggest opportunity in my life is doing all that I can, tomorrow.

Reading thru some of my close friends comments made me that there is always a tomorrow! And that the tomorrow that comes, i have to treasure it. Living it to the fullest, doing the most that i can! This is how i want to live my life. That as i go through each day, each hour, each minute, each moment. I must make sure that i am living to the fullest!! I believe God wants me to learn that today. Through trials, I will learn. Through challenges, I will grow. Thank God for friends again and again!

my deepest apologies and FOP!!

2009-08-03T10:17:00.000-07:00

first, i want to say that whatever, you read at the bottom. it was all frustration and frustrations. i apologize for all the words and the "colorful" language.. however, i do not regret as it was all frustration. that post would serve as a lesson for me. it will be a time for me to really control myself. i know that as christian are suppose to have sanctified mouth. however, no everyone is perfect. i know i did say all those things, so it is over(that part of my life) like what luwei mention on the tag board. it is so true(:

this week has been a great week for me(: being able to attend the Festival Of Praise. the first day was awesome! the msg was just nice for me! the moment i sat down at the seat. i felt that, that day's sermon was a special sermon and it was for me to listen. in addition! pastor Mark Connor asked those that felt that the sermon was for them, to stand up and i stood up. everyone in the hall pray for those standing up. and i felt a huge weight lifted up(: even though i had things that haven been done. my leader didnt scold me and asked to submit to him asap.

i am amazed by what God can do me. if God can take up all my burden then he can do anything for you. carry God's burden for his yoke is light. Follow God and take up his plan and all things will be given and provided to you(:

have a great night!! goodnight!

one day after the day before..

2009-07-24T11:41:00.000-07:00

one day after the day before today. moving on....

nothing much, i didnt cared about it anymore. as long as i know that my mum has nothing to be paid. my dad has to do something about himself.. and the debts. i will help out too. saving and using the money i earn. if not enough, then maybe i need an extra job. i have to push myself to handle it(: i know i can.

i know of a God that helps me always. he has been my provider for a long time. this time, he really want to test my ability of looking for him and having faith in Him.

the post below if you are reading it, better read fast! it will disappear by 25july 2009, 2359.

by the way if you want to know more? email me at dx1r3j@hotmail.com(: mention your name!

the post below shows how one person will react in different times. it isnt what God will do(:

take care!! good bye!

2009-07-23T11:03:00.001-07:00

GOD SAY WE HAVE TO SUFFER? BUT I DON THINK LIKE THIS! I AM SORRY GOD! I AM SORRY..... I AM SORRY. A LITTLE PRAYER MAKES ALL THING WELL

2009-07-23T10:58:00.000-07:00

I AM SORRY, CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE! STUDY HARD! GET GOOD GRADES! ENJOY LIFE! PROSPER! GET DREAMS! GET CAR! GET WHAT I WANT! GET ON WITH LIFE.... WANT TO QUARREL, WANT TO FIGHT, GOOOOOOO GOOO FIGHT!! FOR ALL I CARE. WANT TO BREAK FAMILY! GO! BUT WATCH OUT!! YOU BREAK EVERYTHING AND SAY NOT YOU YOUR FAULT! YOU ARE FORCED! YOU PLAY STUPID GAMES! YOU DO THIS BECAUSE YOU WANT TO GET BACK AT HER! AND MAKE US SUFFER!!!! FUCK YOU!!FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!

struggles.

2009-07-23T10:50:00.000-07:00

i am not sure who will read this. but what the heck?? FAMILY its a place to be safe in, a place where you know there are people you can trust. when relations strains and all things comes down to this thing. called money.. what will happen? i really feel like hurling vulgarities. i really feel like! MONEY MONEY MONEY. TO BE ABLE TE PAY PFF THE DEBTS, TO BE ABLE TO FEED THE FAMILY. TO BE ABLE TO GO FOR TUITION, BUY NECESSITIES, GET THINGS FOR THE HOUSE, SO MANY THINGS. ALL THE THOUGHT GOING THRU MY HEAD. ALL THE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS. I THINK I REALLY FEELING LIKE MOVING AWAY. AWAY FROM HOME. I KNOW I WIL MISS PEOPLE. I KNOW THAT I GOT NOTHING WITH ME. I KNOW ITS JUST RUNNING AWAY. OKAY, I AM SORRY. BUT FUCK IT! I DON CARE ANY MORE! VULGARITIES! FUCK ALL THE THINGS THAT AFFECT MY FAMILY! FUCK ALL THOSE THINGS THAT HURTS MY FAMILY!!!!! FUCK ALL OF YOU!!! I CAN T CANT TKAE ALL THESSE SHIT!! FUCK EVERYTHING !!!!!!!!!!!!!

discipline&priority

2009-06-02T01:30:00.000-07:00

These two words are what i need to have most. at such a time right now, things haven been going well. its so hard to get myself to study. my good friend told me this,"do what you like. if not, like what you do" this fews so true, yet, so difficult to do. what am i working towards? what do i see myself as?

questions, questions, questions.. what the use of the questions? i ask myself again and again. but each time, i have difficult answer. i need one solid and permanent answer. what do i want my life to be? simply that....

just started

2009-04-13T04:30:00.000-07:00

okok, i blog i blog. aiyo, so many people ask me to blog. haha.. well, so much has happen during the time of no blog. haha. went to thailand, with akltg coaches, even my bros from ak also went. i was so happy to be able to coach with yu yuan cos i seldom coach with him. that was llke my 3rd time coahcing with him. haha. well, my results came back and it is so dissapointing. i studied so hard but yet my result is worse then before.. i checked it during my camps. aiyo, bad timing, never ever check your results during camps... it affected me alot lah.. haiz, during the march camps i also learnt alot of stuff. even from my bro, leroy. things happened and i learnt the hard and humilating way.. kristy understands. she was there when i cried. thankew kristy(: also want to thank my friend, serene cos she has been helping me with alot of school stuffs. even things like picking my own timetable. i think without her i am like not in any class now.. hahha.. thanks so much serene!!

ARGH!!! study study, nothing but study!!!

2009-02-10T04:02:00.001-08:00

oh my!!! my first paper is in 11days time!! and i need to study alot!!

really need to do well this sem. i need at least 3.5!! waaaaah!!

i finally get to do business statistic better!! i tell you, it has been a rough day for me. i can do questions until headache. haha. i don know whats happening. haha. maybe too much brain juice used up then not enough.

anyway, i just need to study. and just push myself to work hard! even though it feels like i am choking myself. 2 words: BO BIAN!!

this week my church having morning prayer meetings. so go church early in the morning, 630!! wooohoooooo! haha. it is so good cos it makes me wake up early and sleep early. and gives me more time to study my modules! oh well, hope to post more. haha. see ya! good luck for those taking their exams!!

ARGH!!! study study, nothing but study

2009-02-10T04:02:00.000-08:00

school starting soon!!

2009-01-04T05:58:00.000-08:00

hey hey!! school starting tmw. well, not really happy to start school so quickly. haha. all i can do is to hope that it ends quickly too. plus, on top of that, get good result lah. many a times, i ask too much. i stil remember when a friend said this, ai pi, ai qi, ai dua laip ni. meaning, want cheap, want fresh,want big.. ahaha. thats too mcuh too ask. the world is unfair, not allowing people to have both.. thinking about that, if life were to be fair and you get whatever you want. then where is the hope? where is the wishes? where are the desires and dreams of the people? here, i want leave those reading this post to think about their desires, dreams, those big plans. and work towards it. no worries(: as long as you believe and really want it, with your whole heart, you can have.

painful days...

2008-12-25T10:26:00.000-08:00

so painful to love someone but not able to hear or see that person. for the first time in my life, i felt that pain. that huge amount of pain for missing someone. it hurts whenever i think about her. it hurts whenever i recall the memories. i ask myself what to do. WHAT to do?? at the end i could not do much just sit and think and hope for the day we can be together.. it hurts, it really does..

jarkata superkids camp!!

2008-12-22T21:56:00.000-08:00

17-21dec 2008 was the jakarta superkids camp!! woah it was a damn great camp!!haha. it was the most fun camp i have since going to indo.haha the coaches were so bonded. the kids changed. the closing was awesome!! adam was happy. the camp was great!! i took so many pictures all in facebook(: go take a look!! haaha.

am i the light?

2008-11-26T08:35:00.000-08:00

what does it mean to be the light to someone else's life? what does it mean to be the light of the family? what does it mean to be the light of the city? personal, family, society.. these are the things that most influence people. light has energy. light has power to give and the power to take. light is something so strong. light is essential for our life. have you ever imagine a day without light? well, i want to be that light. the light among my friends, the light in my family, the light of a city. a light that may never be snuffed out, winds can blow, flames can shiver but the light will never stop giving energy and warmth.....

asia conference2008

2008-11-26T08:15:00.000-08:00

last week was Asia conference. the biggest conference organized by CHC. i served as security for four days. i love serving. it has many challenges, many experiences. even though it was super tiring. i continued to serve. however, the last day i totally couldnt wake up at all and missed the services. aiyo, i so too tired. well, i thought my body could last throughout/ well, i was wrong. it felt like the best time ever. just the four days, i learnt more things as security. i don have photos to show but just my experiences.. well, my foreign delegate said that we organised it very well. however, some say some nasty stuff. well, we did the best we could. this is the first time and definitely not the last time..

feeling tired??

2008-11-10T07:36:00.000-08:00

past few days was kinda tiring for me. don know why.. e-learning week assignment forgot to do.. how? so many things on my mind. or maybe just afew things but think too much. life's tough the only way is to persevere. i know that i am going trials and test, He is testing me. i want to be faithful, i want to have breakthrough. it just feel tired thats all.. i want lift all things up to Him. my friends, my work, my burden, cellgroup, my life.. He has a plan, i know after this period. i am coming out strong. to those of you, who is reading this post. i really want to encourage you that do not give up hope on yourself. everyone has struggles, i feel like giving up but i always know to never give up. people around me and you have so much hope for us. many see us, walk out of this tunnel. and now that is left is whether are you willing to take afew more steps to see the beautiful scenery after the tunnel.. "When the world says, "Give up," Hope whispers, 'Try it one more time.' "

the moment of victory,the moment of anguish

2008-11-03T07:15:00.000-08:00

last weekend was one of the most exciting weekend for me. the last race of the formula1 grand prix. that was some of the best racing you will ever see.. i wanted felipe massa to win. but what happen during the race and at the last lap of the race, really taught me something.. anything can and will happen in life and we need to be ready for it. even if we did the best that we can, we do not have the power to control our situations. in this journey that we walk, many things happen, many cause us to fall short of our targets and goals. however, these targets and goals are not meant to be reach it is meant to simply guide us to do the best that we can. this i realised.. friends, do not be sadden or think that your world has crash down on you. but realise how much have you traveled since you set that goal,that you led you to be who you are today! "What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals." ~ Zig Ziglar

i want to race!!!! but.....

2008-10-24T07:47:00.000-07:00

well, i really want to race and i had the opportunity but my parents disapprove of it. their reason is that it is dangerous but i don really care if it tis dangerous. i want to race.. and thats it. now i cant go but in the future i will. i know i will.. so many times, there are things that all of us wants to do, so many things that we desire to get.but there are so many things that stops us, even one thing but that thing has a very big influence to us. what makes us want to go against that? our curiousity?or just to get what we want? i believe many of us have our own desires. but always there are things that stop us. as i continue to type. its the anger of feeling helpless unable to do what we want, that keeps growing. i see myself blowing up and mashing everything around. but what can i do. nothing can be done..................... at the moment. i always believe in visualizing for the things that you want. i am going to visualize myself racing!! believe that one day i am going to race.. i will race! The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning. "~ Ivy Baker Priest i truly believe...!

things yet to be done and things to be done...

2008-10-20T08:54:00.000-07:00

aiyo, since this is the week where all my class schedule is fully functional. this is also the week where i will start on all my work and projects. well, the title of this post is simple, just wanna set myself to score well in this sem. cos i realised many a times people always set out to do something but at the end that particular thing is not done or completed. which cause so many disappointment and losing of faith in myself and others in me. and that is me, a person who cant really keep to what he wants to accomplish. starting from today, things gonna be different. i am gonna set out the things to do. and i will complete them.even from the smallest things to the most important things. i know i want to and i know i can. the rest is up to my will to do it.. things gonna be different. there will no longer be the same dejun as last ten months. dejun will be upraded. better performance, more reliable, able to multi task, able to handle all processes, and of course, with FUN in everything. "when you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place" ~unknown

our mistakes, our greatest realisation...

2008-10-15T09:15:00.000-07:00

WE are human, WE are people, WE make bad choices, WE are not perfect. BUT life is so simple, we make choices and not look back.... this sentence may not be full of complexity ,however, its just so simple to understand. for last two days many things happen, many sadness, many anger, many confusion, many questions but of all these many. there is one ray of forgiveness. and thats more than enough. there is struggles, everyone struggles but i pray.. that let each struggles encourage one to continue this journey of one's life... to walk to the end of the dark tunnel.. where a beautiful garden awaits us to enter....

starting on the right foot..

2008-10-14T08:08:00.001-07:00

well school started.. and the last sem was totaled!! rubbish. scraped through. haiz..... so right now i am half way through my slides. aiyo, first week only must do slides. well, i gotta stop complaining and start moving my slim ass.. well, through the hols, so many things happen. stop going DB, no gym, no money enough. on te other hand, i really had lots of fun.. and alot of movies.. haha. well,thats a summary..... of the holidays. and time to move on to the new sem.. so study!!!! GO FELIPE MASSA!!! this man gonna win the world championship!!yea..

vrrrooooooom!!!

2008-09-04T09:02:00.000-07:00

i almost forgot one very exciting,exhilarating,excruciating,extreme carzy. i sat in leroy's WREX STI '05 edition. my first step into my future!! his car is the most powerful beast i ever sat on. if you can imagine my face with my mouth opening up so big for a truck to go through. it lasted only for afew seconds. but the few seconds was crazy, he stepped on the accelerator and i almost went inside my seat.. woah, his ride is crazy, he is gonna have a team, a racing team using this other WREX03edition. i cant wait to be on his team..hahahahahahahaha.. i am crazyed bout car.. anytime you ask me choose between a car or girl. i choose car anytime!! heh... evo and wrex are my future rides.. watch out!! COMING SOON!! in dejun's garage.haa leroy'STI totally rock!!!

really gotta blog!!!

2008-09-04T08:35:00.000-07:00

HEY okay i am really updating my blog now. well i am just busy and many a times not having enough time to sit and blog. well, updating on past few weeks: i ended my exams last week. so i was really a crazy time for me after alot of struggles and challenges during the whole sem. i finally finally able to rest.. as in enjoy myself(: then for the past few days i have been going out few my friends, jia kang, ed, sheng qin, jof,john and many more. last week i got hooked onto command and conquer:generals. that game blew me off my chair, the first time i played lasted me four hours. the second another four hours. i played for almost the whole week. leroy, jason,jeff,kristy and theresa. it was great fun. hahahaha( cant wait to play again) last friday i went to comex with john jia kang, yi ping, regina. i went there got a external hard disk and a mouse for gaming.. haha.. investment for the future in gaming. haha. then went over to popeye for dinner. the chicken was super goodddd. woah, must go more often. haha. and now for the bad news,, my toe nail came off !!! wah seh the feeling was heavenly pain.. wah, thank God not the whole toe nail. if not,,,,, i not sure what to do.. becoome depress maybe.haha. for the past few days was gaming again.. this time i learnt how to play warcraft, even though i kinda lousy at it. every few seconds i died..haiz.. well, my hero was a late hero so in the end i was the strongest. with my rain of chaos( actually is rain of fire) i killed the last monster in the hero siege.heh heh.. good right? haha okay really do check me out more, cos i will be dragonboating alot and of course getting bigger(: see ya,

today, today!!

2008-08-18T10:19:00.000-07:00

TWO down two more to go. haiz, still gotta study.. i am waiting for the holidays to come. then go enjoy and relax.. haha. well, today i sis and my mum finally came back from a six day tournament at malaysia, kedah. wah seh, gotta give my hands to her. she WON the doubles championship. she is the real deal, haha. well, i really missed her. the days alone at home without her voice, her presense, herself, is indeed silent. my sister is really cute, while i was typing this post, she came in lay down on my bed and now sleeping on my bed. haha.. here, i want to say all the best to my sister, hoping she will be able to represent singapore in the youth olympics 2010. this is my sister: haha.. sleep sleep.. oh oh and she bought this for me. now can fight with edmund liao ..haha..(even though his one is crocodile mine is don know what..) enjoy this two pictures in the mean time.. Mr.Dj

"Dreams gives us hope and hope gives us tomorrow... tomorrow we may find love.... have you found your dream yet?"

thanks edmund!!!

2008-08-16T08:09:00.000-07:00

aiyo, i tell you this blog credits goes this good brother of mine.. he help me zhng my blog until so nice.. wah seh, thank him so much. intially, i don even know how to do anything. until he teach me.. in the end still no time to do.. haha. and now it is done!!! you can even see my face... haha..okay, after exam i will blog again!!! see you guys. thanks for dropping by.. Mr.Dj signing off...

the things learnt..

2008-07-18T00:36:00.000-07:00

After so much that i have gone through not only n life but even in school. i have actually better understand myself through the various LMS lessons. i have two units that have actually impacted me most. these two units are fear management and understanding you & me. through the past few weeks, my group has been very cooperative. we have been working rather well. even thought there are times where we have different thoughts and ideas. we have applied what we learnt from understanding you and me into it. example, whenever we have different ideas, we would always hear each other ideas before deciding what or which is the best. we have been listening to each other very well. we have used the effective listening strategy: 1.having a good attitude 2. being open minded 3.resisting the barriers to listen 4.listening to the non-verbal 5.responding appropriately 6.empathetic listening response In the unit of fear management, i have learn that when are the times i have experienced fear, the times when i feel my muscles tighten up, when i start to scratch my head and bite my lips. these are actually the times where i feel fear. thus through these fear i have been giving myself many negative thoughts and feelings. there are times where i asked myself," why is it others can do it but not me?" these questions are in fact very negative, i should be much more positive about myself. i should ask myself more encouraging questions,"how can i learn from other people?" or by giving myself encouragement," come on, dejun!! this is not the end yet. its time to push myself harder!!" there are also fear driven behaviours, for me i do not usually do it. however, there are times where i will actually run(not physically) away from the challenges. this is sometimes not encouraging. i am just sweeping the challenges under the carpet but not resolving the challenges. at the same time, through the lessons, i have actually start to learn from the experiences. the experiences are very dear to me these are things that you are not able to learnt else where. its a life skill that everyone may or may not go through. there are ways to conquer these fear, 1. knowing your fear 2. mastering your fear 3.reducing the physical signs of fear. 4. dealing with negative self talks 5. plan the action plan. Conflict management is also very important. there are negative and positive consequences to it. we always look highest positive outcome. so thru proper conflict management we are able to: 1.improve self-awareness 2.strengthen relationships 3.promotes group cohesion 4.promotes creativity 5.help problem-solving 6.be fun and motivating howver, proper conflict is needed!! so there are steps to proper management of conflict: 1.Know yourself and focus on what is most important to you. Identify the best outcome to attain, your goal, and the minimum acceptable outcome i can accept. 2. Look for others’ needs. give them the benefit of doubt and do not assume anything. Anticipate trouble and prevent it. Anticipate how he reacts to your actions when meeting him to resolve the conflict. Speak in a tone that the other person feels comfortable. Look for sources of fear and anger. 3: Take time to build trust. Show that you are really listening. Acknowledge differences and seek suggestions on how to move towards a mutually agreeable solution. Spend more time to get to know him. Practise smiling and watch your body language. Find out exactly what he wants, how a feels. Listen to show respect and that he is being heard. Control your negative emotions. 4: Address the other person’s needs first. Begin with positive points, move on to negative news and end on a positive note. Providing more options will help you to move towards agreement. Stay flexible. Acknowledge but need not agree. In someone's self awareness, there is always four panes 1.PUBLIC SELF: Information about feelings and attitudes that I share with others. 2.BLIND SPOT: Mannerism and other aspects of behavior of which I am unaware. 3.PRIVATE SELF: Information I choose not to share. 4.UNKNOWN AREA: Information unknown to me and to others. these panes show the areas people know abotu them self. there people whoes actions hurts other but that person do not know it. these panes show what kind of self awareness someone has. There are people in the world that has low self esteem but many of those people actually hides them by putting a mask on their face! below i will show you their patterns of behaviour. 1.The Workaholic The person is constantly striving to get ahead so that he can obtain validation and approval from others. He may also be unaware of what he truly values in life. Despite his achievements, he is rarely satisfied with what he has. 2.The Doormat This person is very likeable as she always offers a helping hand or become the problem-solver. She may care for others out of a need to be accepted. Very often, she will put the needs of others above hers to the extent of tacitly accepting victimization (for extreme cases), further draining her energy and self-esteem. 3.The Critic Always quick to condemn, gossip or put down anyone who is different or has made some achievements. This is a reflection of their own unhappiness with their self-image and their inability to take constructive action to address their own situation. 4.The Perfectionist In a bid to justify their worth, the perfection is always striving to be the best and to attain excellence. 5.The Scarecrow Just like the scarecrow in the “Wizard of Oz” who is searching for a brain, the scarecrow in this context is without a mind of his own. He doesn’t trust his own uniqueness and believes that the only way is to blindly follow the trend or to do what everyone else is doing. 6.The Shirker The person who shirks his responsibilities may be suffering from a lack of confidence in his ability. If something goes wrong, he may blame the problems on someone else, finding it difficult to acknowledge responsibility for his own actions. the are ways to enhance our self esteem: 1. value ourselves -• The Workaholic The person is constantly striving to get ahead so that he can obtain validation and approval from others. He may also be unaware of what he truly values in life. Despite his achievements, he is rarely satisfied with what he has. • The Doormat This person is very likeable as she always offers a helping hand or become the problem-solver. She may care for others out of a need to be accepted. Very often, she will put the needs of others above hers to the extent of tacitly accepting victimization (for extreme cases), further draining her energy and self-esteem. • The Critic Always quick to condemn, gossip or put down anyone who is different or has made some achievements. This is a reflection of their own unhappiness with their self-image and their inability to take constructive action to address their own situation. • The Perfectionist In a bid to justify their worth, the perfection is always striving to be the best and to attain excellence. • The Scarecrow Just like the scarecrow in the “Wizard of Oz” who is searching for a brain, the scarecrow in this context is without a mind of his own. He doesn’t trust his own uniqueness and believes that the only way is to blindly follow the trend or to do what everyone else is doing. • The Shirker The person who shirks his responsibilities may be suffering from a lack of confidence in his ability. If something goes wrong, he may blame the problems on someone else, finding it difficult to acknowledge responsibility for his own actions. there are ways to enhance your self esteem: 1.value yourself i. Acknowledge and Appreciate Your Positive Qualities ii. Practise Self-Affirmation 2. Deal with Negative Beliefs i. Limiting Beliefs ii. Let Go of Limiting Beliefs 3. Positive Thinking i. Reframing ii. Visualisation iii. Anchoring 4. Surround Yourself with Positive & Supportive People 5. Take Time to Enjoy Life I am actually listening to music while typing this, the song is by avril lavinge, called keep holding on. it has the lyrics that sings, "keep holding on, just staying strong ,cos i know i will make it through". this song is actually very similar to fear. to those that is reading this post, keep holding on and staying strong. our exams are near, lets strive on to work for excellence without fear!!!!

gym hard, study hard!!

2008-07-09T22:32:00.000-07:00

Again time to blog. haha. well, due my good friends at ngee ann. their muscles getting bigger!! MY GOD!! i also training. haha. for the pass few days, i have been going to gym almost everyday. well, my target is to have a nice body.. strong also lah. so can push the dragonboat mah. haiz its has been so long since i go for the draginboat liao. not much of my friends going also. cos they all have their test coming up this week. so they jio me go gym. later, i will be going gym so most likely i will be training abs and shoulders again.. then do somemore running. for the past weeksss no training. i became fatter laio lah.. so gotta run.. haha. okay that will be all for this post.. i will post again.. see ya guys soon. for a want of a horseshoe, the horse was lost. for the want of a horse, the message was not delivered. for a want of a lost message, the war was lost. Japanese qoute.. in life we need to set everything down, so at the end there will be result for us..

okay, blog blog!!!

2008-07-02T10:08:00.000-07:00

now!! this post is specailly dedicated to edmund koh, for pushing me to go blog. haha. well, i was think of blogging afew days ago. but just couldnt find the time. due all the projects and presentation coming up. now the time is 1am.. i got a presentation tmw at 11am. aiyo, still gotta dress smartly. today, i thought i had retest for my POA, which i failed the first test. however, i went into the venue and found out it is a remedial lesson. haiz, so dump of me. moving on!! the remedial was indeed very useful for me i had many of my doubts cleared and understand POA much much better. initially, after failing two of my test, i had thoughtd of changing course. right now, i decided to just move on with this course. well people in life sometimes really faces alot of challenges. for me, i know i will always go through as long i never give up.. well, i will be blogging soon.. so look out, dejun is coming back!! by the way, i am jealous of you guys building up your muscles so fast.. i wil also build up!!!!!!

argh!! my skin is peeling!!

2008-05-07T07:24:00.000-07:00

Now after a few days, my skin is peeling. haha.. after the very nice tan and all the pain, my sjin is peeling or rather its dropping off..haha. And it only means one thing, its time for more tan! haha. well, this few days kinda tired. Woke up really late and getting late for classes. aiiyo, luckily my classmates are gonna help me give me wake up calls tmw. ahaha. thanks a huge bunch. haha.. okay, i only wish to be more discipline and each time i rest, it will be the best rest i will ever get.. life is just like that, there will be times where you will be weary but those who hang on and perservere will eventually become less tired and strong. haha. well now seems like i got the hang of blogging.. so i will continue to blog. haha. well, edmund ask me to add the tag board but i cant figure it out. it is so chim for me.. haha. and for those has visited my blog, i say a big thankew!!! just give me the advices to improve on thats all.. haha. okay i go do tutorial liao.. so look out for the next blogging time. haha(wah like some kind of advertistment. haha)

pain for tanned

2008-05-01T22:43:00.000-07:00

wah i just went to sentosa yesterday. aiyo now, my body so pain. but for a tan, i think its okay.. haha. joey said that i am not tan, i am burnt. quite true actually. i am so dark next time you see me, you off the lights, may be can see my white parts only haha. well, sill kinda neew to the blog but no w i am learning what to write and what i can do. but i don think anyone will see my blog. haha. cos i didnt tell anyone about it.. haha. okay i will stop here, se when will i come in to update agian. haha

Self-Esteem

2008-05-01T10:06:00.000-07:00

From the discussion, i find that everyone has a inner self, someone that he or she wants others to look at and another self that is very private. one of the most meaningful things that i realised is how one person can manage his or her fears. using such method we are able to overcome so much more things in life, that we are afraid of or having a fear of doing it. Through the discussion i also learnt that each person has different self esteem, some people may have very high self esteem and others havce lower self esteem. However there are ways to boost the self esteem, such as making the person feel good about themselves or just loving themselves. I feel that i have a rather high self esteem. i am not afraid to talk to people and always feel good about myself. At the same time i am not perfect, i sometimes feel that people who uses words to put me does actually affect my self esteem. These are just some of it, there are also times where i felt that i does not do a good or just someone just takes over my jobs, which makes myself feel that i am redundant. At these times, i would always find ways to boost my self esteem up again. One way is for me take i step back and reorganise my thoughts. Then i would start to push myself up. Five years down i would want people to remember as someone who has: 1.impacted the lives or others through my actions. 2.been someone who would bring happiness to others 3.been there for them 4.always been giving his best 5. always respected by others Five years before, i was a tiny boy who is very afraid to talk to people. never will to be the best for myself. Many things has change since then, i have become someone who is not afraid to talk to people and always made sure the things i do is the best for me. In life the will defintely be obstacles and challenges. At the same time, life in singapore has been to fasted paced. My strategy for all the challenges would be to slow down, take a step back and look forward to solve it! These challenges would most probably be peer pressure, working stress, time, financial management. Most importantly would be time as each person has only 24 hr a day and it needs to be planned!! If you fail to plan, you plan to fail!! the future starts today, not tomorrow-Pope John Paul II

what is this?

2008-04-25T00:35:00.000-07:00

aiyo..this is my first time using.. i don know a thing. so i am just testing out the blog.